Looping the Hen

To the Lime Tree

If you make it over here, welcome. I spent an hour reading some of your blog last night; good stuff.

Glad you are well.

A Call from the Blue

Received an email and phone call from an old, dear friend today needing some help. Could've knocked me over with a feather. Life is funny sometimes.

Back to Good

Ugg, I haven't train wrecked in a while, people are supposed to warn me when I become unhinged! I woke up this morning after my first good night's sleep in 3 days with typical 'OMG, what have I done?' thoughts running through my head. Like most guys, I don't ever read the instructions for anything. Not that blogging has any instructions, but I know there are hundreds of tips pages that probably would have told me not to 'blog emotional.'

That advice is up there with 'Don't clean your pistol while contemplating suicide' or 'Picking a fight in a Mexican bar is not an idea that will get you nominated for Mensa.'

In any case, I seem to have found my way back to good. Not that being off-kilter for a few days over a pretty girl is necessarily a bad thing, just not something that was on my list of things to do this year.

I'm sure she'll be happy to know I'll quit stalking her now. Though it may have been serendipitous, I checked my Yahoo email for the first time in ages this morning and the top email was about Blizzcon coming up at the end of the month. If I have my facts straight from the 4am call, Jess's husband just got a job for Blizzard (hence the flight back to America), making her attendance assured had I chosen to hop a plane for Anaheim.

So y'all can see where that thought-train [wreck] was headed for about 10 seconds. I think I'll just go flagellate myself instead, it'll do less damage in the long run.

I hope you landed safe Jess! If you would, please drop me an e-mail address at some point so I can remove my infatuation from the public eye.

No more drama...

Just fly safe, ashke.

Bon Nuit, Xenmis

QUEEN OF ARGYLL (Go Listen and buy if you like)

Gentle men it is my duty
To inform you of one beauty
Though I'd ask of you a favor,
Not to seek her for a while
Though I own she is a creature
Of character and feature
No words can paint the picture
of the Queen of all Argyll.

(Chorus)
And if you could have seen her there,
Boys if you had just been there
The swan was in her movement,
And the morning in her smile.
All the roses in the garden,
They bow and ask her pardon
For not one could match the beauty
Of the queen of all Argyll.

On that evening that I mention,
I passed with light intention
Through a part of our dear country
Known for beauty and for style
Being a place of noble thinkers,
Of scholars and great drinkers
But above them all for splendour
Shone the Queen of all Argyll

So my lads my needs must leave you,
My intention's not to grieve you
Nor indeed would I decieve you,
Oh I'll see you in a while
I must find some way to gain her,
To court her and to tame her
I fear my heart's in danger
From the Queen of all Argyll

(old Celtish/Irish song)

Yahoo 1, Google 0

As I sit here with butterflies in my tummy hoping for a random phone call from Jessica Rabbit, I need to tell the owners of Google that you ain't all that! So here I was, running myself ragged doing my best 007 spy work, and Google slips me tantalizing 5 year old links, 7 year old dead-sea newsgroups, but nothing of the current Livejournal blog my quarry keeps updated regularly. On a whim (actually, I was using Yahoo's People Search), I did a Yahoo search and score, 10 minutes later I am reading not only some light erotica by Lady Jessica but looking at my muse in various stages of dress and undress.

Advantage: Yahoo

The needle in the haystack might find you...

Well, ugg, crap...now that I've found her, I'm certain she will find her way here to my silly ramblings and creepy obsessions for a girl I knew only a little while many years ago.;) If I get really lucky she may think I am sweet and ignore all the rest of it.

See, there's something wrong with trying to look up people from your past...you may actually find them!

Okay, my three readers (sorry Jess, I just started my blog a week ago) need to tell her I'm not really that crazy! (Well, unless she likes crazy, of course...)

Update: Upon further examination of her site, it seems she is happily not-single (boo!), so I am back to my soulmate search. Ahh well; my brother of the always-crazy ideas insists he has a scientific way to find me a bride post-haste. I am going to be his guinea pig to see if his process is patentable.

Jess, please forgive the kissing comment on your blog, I hadn't seen you were attached yet!

Jessica revisited...

Hmm...I wonder if I could have spelled her name wrong? I found at least two female gamers (a rare breed indeed) named Jessica McEwan (with an A instead of a 2nd E). Of course, every picture of a woman with McEwan for a last name I have found so far is beautiful with flaming red hair (but to be honest I cannot tell if they are her), so that doesn't help narrow anything down. I sent emails to two random websites looking for contact information, wish me luck! I will keep y'all updated!

Update:
Okay, now I really am a stalker (Someone please tell me I'm not a stalker!). I found out for sure I spelled her name wrong and I Googled up a 1998 copy of her resume. I am going to work my way down the phone numbers and references and see if anyone is still in touch with her. Of course, with my luck she is married with 5 rugrats. I would be very happy for her anyway!

An almost soulmate...

Do you ever have those moments where you're sure a smile and look from someone crossing paths with you at the grocery store or at a restaurant is a possible prelude to a life full of romance and springtime? And yet you tear yourself away and just keep walking by like nothing has happened. It has only happened a couple of times in my life, the most recent being a few weeks ago. Not ten minutes after I left where it happened, I was kicking myself for my cowardice in not just walking up to her table and asking to sit down.

Once I met a girl that way that I did actually talk to. For hours and hours the night we met at a Magic the Gathering tournament (yes, I'm a geek!), we discussed every standard from music to boys to the not-quite standard latex allergy she had. (Yes, in that context) We were friends for a little while, but by the time I had gotten around to finally voicing my desire for her it was literally about 5 hours too late and she had started dating someone. (It is possible she never would have considered dating me and was just putting it the way she did to be nice...but I don't think so)

She already lived a bit far to drive for me at the time, and I didn't have the strength or ego left in me to wait for my next chance.

I know this note has next to zero chance to ever find its way to her (Yes, I've already done all the searches I know how to do), but this is for Jessica McEwen (Lordie I hope I remembered her name right, its been over 10 years!). She was about 5'3, 110, with fiery red hair and a laugh that made me weak. She lived in Connecticut, up near New London or Norwich or some such. If you ever Google yourself and find yourself here, I hope you'll drop me a line. I've always wondered if there was a way to pick up where we left off. (Plus the fact that I'm much cuter and richer and more stable than I once was, though maybe less funny!) And if anyone who knows her ever Googles her and finds their way here, I hope you will let her know someone is looking for her.

(I think they call this stalking or something, but oh well!)